Another bad parent admission - my kids learned how to cuss from dear ol mom. Yep, I can out swear their bad boy biker, once-upon-a-time Marine daddy any old day.
So, I'm standing in the hallway of my dinky 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom "bungalow" doing the pee pee dance, begging my twelve year old to hurry the hell up. He even asked if I was doing the pee pee dance, meaning he was going to take his sweet ass time trying to torture me. I reminded him that I can and will get even.
"AUGH! That's NOT fair," he wails from the bathroom, still dawdling.
"Yeah, well life's a bitch," I inform him, "and so is your mother."
And then I say, "you know... if your mother is a bitch... that makes you.........
a son of a bitch!"
"Mom, you're not right"
Now hurry up before I go pee in front of you
FINALLY, I get the bathroom. Geez. Whose stupid idea was it to move into a house with just one bathroom????
23 hours ago